Week 4 Blog: Who Am I as a Communicator

Surprises

 There were few surprises about the similarities and differences between how I evaluated myself as a communicator and how my husband and a friend evaluated me.  The results of all of the assessments done by my friend were also the same as mine. The fact that my score for the Listening Styles Profile was the same despite who completed the survey seemed to indicate that I am a People-Oriented listener, however, I thought the definition of the Action-Oriented listener was a better fit. I think that the thing that surprised me the most was that the results were so similar despite who completed the inventory.  I really expected that my own perspective of my communication skills would have been different from the perspective of that of my husband and friend. 

Insights

One insight about communication that I gained this week is that while the inventory assigned a specific score based on how others and I answered the questions, I feel that I could see myself across the entire range of possibilities depending on the situation.  A second insight is that I have made progress in becoming a better communicator by improving my listening skills.   This is something that I have made a concerted effort to do.  O’Hair & Wiemann (2012) tell us that an empathetic listening style is associated with showing care and avoiding judgment.  The results of the Listening Styles Profile validate that I have made progress in this area.  Had I completed these scales several years ago, I think the results would have been very different.

Professional & Personal

As a result of the Application assignment, I have a better insight into and deeper awareness of my own communication strengths and weaknesses in both professional and personal settings.  I discovered that I need to make the same kind effort in personal communications that I do when I am in a professional setting.

Reference

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s

Week 3 Blog

I do find that I communicate differently with people from different groups and cultures.  If is someone that I know well I am more comfortable and am more likely to use slang and tease and joke more.  Professionally, I communicate differently based on the audience.  In a large group of other early childhood professionals, I am more likely to use acronyms and jargon that I know others in the group will be familiar with.   I work at a bilingual preschool program. Several of the teachers and many of the parents speak Spanish.  I speak more slowly, use simpler words and listen very carefully.  We have a Spanish-speaking cook at the program where I work.  My Spanish is very limited and so I find that I must rely on lots of gestures to communicate effectively with her. 

The first strategy that I could use to help me communicate more effectively is to improve my listening skills.   When talking with Spanish speaking parents, I tend to be nervous about my limited ability to speak Spanish and so it is sometimes difficult to stay focused on listening.  I also tend to be very businesslike and so I have found that I need to stop, listen carefully and give all of my attention to the person who is speaking. 

The second strategy that I could use would be becoming more other-oriented.  As Bebee, Bebee & Redmond (2011) point out, “focusing on others rather than yourself… is an important way to enhance your interpersonal competence” (p. 111).  According to Bebee, et al. (2011), becoming other-oriented involves taking into account “the other person’s thoughts, values, background, and overall perspective” and to “put yourself into someone else’s place emotionally and consider what that person is feeling” (p. 112).  As Gonzalez-Mena (2010) reminds us, “it’s uncomfortable to begin questioning what we already know, but it’s important to do so when working in an early childhood setting that includes diverse families you don’t see eye to eye with” (p. 36). 

The third strategy that I can use is related to body language. Since taking this class, I have become much more aware of my body language.  I am careful to ensure that my body language is communicating my interest in what the other person is saying.  I turn towards the other person, am careful not cross my arms, nod, smile and watch carefully to use the amount of direct eye contact that the speaker is comfortable with. 

Reference:

Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal communication: Relating to others (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon.

Chapter 4, "Interpersonal Communication and Diversity: Adapting to Others" (pp. 85–114)


Retrieved from https://class.waldenu.edu/bbcswebdav/institution/USW1/201420_02/MS_MECS/EDUC_6165/Week%203/Resources/Resources/embedded/beebe_ch4.pdf

Gonzalez-Mena, J. (2010). 50 strategies for communicating and working with diverse families. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.

"Understanding and Appreciating Cultural Differences" (pp. 36–38)

Watching Days of Our Lives

I had to watch several shows before finding one that would work for this class.  I tried watching a show Nickelodeon, which seemed to be geared toward preteens, but found that it was just too predictable.  I also tried That 70s Show, but also found it to be very predictable.  It was very easy to tell what was going even without listening to the sound.  I decided to try watching a soap opera Days of Our Lives.  When watching the show without listening to the sound, it seemed that a priest was having an affair with a woman.  It also seemed that a young woman was either plotting with an older man or that the older man was counseling her.  Most of the other relationships were par for the course for soap operas.  There were 2 girls who were plotting against another girl over a boy.  There was also an estranged mother and son.  There were a wide variety of emotions and feeling displayed by the characters that were easy to read even without the sound.  Emotions and feelings the characters displayed included:  happiness, sadness, anger, disappointment, sympathy, and concern.

When watching the show with the sound, I found that for the most part, I had correctly interpreted the relationships and emotions. There were 2 relationships that I had misinterpreted.   The first was the relationship between the priest and the woman.  As it turned out, the woman was the mother of the priest and that was why they were kissing and hugging.  The other relationship that I had misunderstood was the one between the young woman and the older man.  The man was the woman’s father who was helping her with a problem she was having. 

This assignment gave me the opportunity to see how well I could interpret communication without actually hearing the words that people were using.  It was much easier to correctly interpret the emotions displayed than it was to accurately “read” the relationships between the characters.  Based on this experience, I have a better understanding of the limitations of only using nonverbal communication to make assumptions.  As O’Hair & Wiemann (2012) pointed out, “nonverbal communication is often ambiguous (p. 129) and so advise us to “regard nonverbal behavior as cues to be checked out rather than as facts” (p. 130). 

Reference

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s

Communication & Collaborating in the Early Childhood Field -WEEK 1

For me, the person who comes to mind as someone who demonstrates competent communication is a former supervisor and the specific context is when we met for supervision meetings.   According to O’Hair & Wiemann (2012), competent communication “ is more concerned with process, which measures the success of communication by considering the methods by which an outcome is accomplished” (p. 14). My former supervisor exemplified that ability to focus on the process.  One of the most effective behaviors that this person exhibited during these meetings was the ability to really listen to what I said.  She was truly present and it was obvious that I had her full attention.  Her body language, reflective questions and thoughtful answers all created an environment that made me feel safe, valued and heard. As O’Hair & Wiemann (2012) point out, “From the process perspective, it is better to optimize outcomes for both partners than to fulfill the specific goals of either one:  mutual satisfaction is used as the gauge of success” (p. 16).   My former supervisor was careful about the pacing of the conversation.   She was able to sense when to move on to another topic. She was gifted at asking questions and was careful about how and when she offered information or opinions.  She also did a good job of following the National Communication Association Credo for Ethical Communication principle that states “we strive to understand and respect other communicators before evaluating and responding to their messages” (p.  15).  This principle is closely related to the statement made by O’Hair  & Wiemann (2012) “Successful communicators usually have a high degree of cognitive complexity.   This refers to the ability to consider multiple scenarios, formulate multiple theories, and make multiple interpretations when encoding and decoding messages” (p. 24).  This person could easily be considered a successful communicator using the information from O’Hair & Wiemann and the principles outlined in the National Communication Association Credo for Ethical Communication.

The behavior that I would most like to emulate is her ability to truly listen.  This ability has many positive outcomes.  This ability to truly listening builds trust by conveying the message that what is being said is valued and understood.  It also offers the chance to show respect for the speaker and the opportunity to develop the high degree of cognitive complexity both of which are traits of an effective communicator.  So often, I find that I am thinking about what I am going to say rather than being truly present in the moment and really listening to the other person.  

Reference:

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s

Week 8-Diversity, Equity, and Social Justice

When I think about working with children and families from diverse backgrounds, one hope that I have is that I can always welcome and respect the differences that they bring.  As Derman-Sparks & Edwards (2010) pointed out, “In a society as diverse as ours, maneuvering through its multiple cultures can be complex and confusing, as well as rich and delightful” (p. 55).  

One goal that I would like to set for the early childhood field related to the issues of diversity, equity, and social justice is that all early childhood professionals be exposed to the anti-bias curriculum.  Exposure to the anti-bias curriculum would ensure that professionals have the opportunity to learn about others and about themselves with regards to diversity, equity, and culture.

I would like to thank each of you for your honest and candid personal stories that you shared.  While information from the resources and videos can be very moving and pertinent to the topic, it is the personal stories of classmates that give a face to the theories, data, facts and research.   

Reference

Derman-Sparks, L., & Edwards, J. O. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, DC: NAEYC.

Welcoming Families from Around the World

The country that I chose for this assignment is the Central African Republic.  To prepare for this family’s arrival, I would learn as much as I could about the country.  Below are some basic facts about the Central African Republic

According to Wikipedia (Wikipedia, 2013), in the Central African Republic, there are over 80 ethnic groups.   I found that in this country, the main language is French with a dialect called Central African French as well as lots of indigenous languages. The language spoken by most is Sango. While French is the official language few people speak French and almost no one speaks English. There is great civil unrest in the Central African Republic, there are major human rights violations and the rates of HIV are high.  The per capita income is $300.00/year. More than 50% of the population is affiliated with a Christian religion.  Exporting food is the major source of revenue in the country.  The life expectancy for both men and women is under 50 years old.    

In order to prepare myself to be culturally responsive to the family I would take the following steps.

1.  The first thing that I would do is find out what language or languages the family might speak.  I would also try to learn something about the literacy rates in the country.  Once I had information about the language and literacy rates, I would learn a few basic words and phrases that I could use to greet the family.  I would also contact agencies that offer translation/interpretation services so that I could have someone available to assist with communicating with the family. 

2.  The second thing that I would do in order to be culturally responsive would be to learn what I could about traditions and customs in the Central African Republic.

After learning about the traditions, I would try to learn more about the beliefs and values that underlie the traditions.

3.  The third thing that I would do would be to learn something about the food that is traditionally eaten.  After learning about traditional foods, I would try to find out if there are local stores that stock the ingredients the family might need.

4.  The fourth thing that I would do is learn about the political, economic and social climate in the country.  This would help me be sensitive to possible fears or trauma that the family might have experienced.  This would also help as I gather information about resources that the families may need.

5.  The fifth thing that I would do is gather some pictures or artifacts from the Central African Republic.   I would make a small book to place in the library area, or display the photos in various places in the classroom. 

I think these steps would beneficial for the family and myself.  Gathering information about all aspects of the Central African Republic would help me be knowledgeable and would give me a deeper sense of what the family might have experienced.  Following these steps would also help me gather resources that I could share with the family about local resources, and social and religious groups that might help the family get established.  Being able to say a few words/phrases would let the family know that I was making an effort to connect with them.  It would also be necessary for me to reflect on any stereotypes or preconceived ideas that I might have about people living in very poor African countries.  As Derman-Sparks & Edwards (2010) point out “ongoing learning about yourself and well as about the children and families you serve, makes it possible to effectively decide what to say, what to do, when to wait, ad when to act in many different kinds of settings” (p. 21). 

Reference

Derman-Sparks, L., & Edwards, J. O. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and

ourselves. Washington, DC: NAEYC.

Wikipedia. (2013, August 14).  Central African Republic.  Retrieved from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_African_Republic

Blog Week 6-The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

A director of a bilingual preschool shared the story of her first experiences with school with me.  Her story illustrates bias and prejudice.  She was about 8 years old when she and her family moved from Mexico to the United States.  She and her family only spoke Spanish.   She was placed in a classroom with children of the same age, where she was the only person of color.  She was placed in a desk that was at the back of the room and apart from the other children.  She was given a coloring book to keep her busy.  There were no attempts by the teacher or the other children to interact with her.  Once a day for an hour, the ESL teacher came to work with her. 

This scenario demonstrates how, as a child, this woman was marginalized.  Her place in the classroom and the lack of interaction with the other children and teacher were based on stereotypes and the perceptions of the teacher and children.  She was not given the same attention or opportunity to learn that the other children.  She was made to feel invisible because she of her ethnicity, language, appearance and culture.   I would guess that this child had feelings much like Taylor (2011) who states “And so I remember that there were pieces of feeling sort of left out or different through circumstances that weren’t my own or things that I hadn’t caused anyway”. 

This situation made me feel angry with the teacher for treating this child in such an unjust manner and with the school for letting this kind of thing occur. It also made me feel sad for the child who had to endure a year of this kind of treatment.  The most obvious changes that could have turned this incident into an opportunity would have been the use of strategies for working with English Language Learners and cultural sensitivity training for the staff. Even without these changes, there are a number of steps that could have turned this situation into one with greater equity.  Just allowing the child to sit with rather than away from the class would have been a way to help the child be an equal partner in the classroom.  Attempts by the teacher to interact with the child would have also made her visible rather than invisible and would have served as a model for the children in the classroom.  Giving the child access to the same learning materials as the other children would have also resulted in greater equity between the child and the other students on the classroom. 

Reference

Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer), (2011). In her own voice:  Nadiyah Taylor.  [Video

            program]. Baltimore, MD.